You know those sound machines some people use when they sleep? Well, my mom and I have a running joke about hers, since she finds it super calming and I find it super annoying. They usually come with five or so different sounds, and I just can’t relax with any of them! Typical sound machine options usually include:
- The ocean. Instead of being soothed by the waves, I get too focused on counting the back and forth sounds of the tide. (In-one-out-two-in-three-out-four-in-omg-out-this-is-driving-me-nuts!!)
- White noise. How obnoxious. It makes me want to go make sure the tv is turned off. I can’t fall asleep when my ears are ringing.
- Rain. Sound machine rain is weird. I lay there and think about how it doesn’t sound quite like real rain, which is awkward. And then I get distracted thinking about if the sound machine makers recorded real rain, or if they computer generate it, or if they use one of those rain sticks, and then I think about foley artists, and how one becomes a foley artist, and blah blah, I’m still not sleeping.
Now, ever since fourth of July I’ve been thinking of some things I would actually enjoy listening to while I sleep. So, if I made a sound machine, it would include:
- Fireworks. I love the sound of fireworks-they are enchanting and exciting, and very encouraging. You know? Like if fireworks are going off it makes you feel like you’re living in some wonderful movie climax and that everything in your life is going to work out ok. Now that’s a comforting feeling to fall asleep too! Plus the crackle and pop sounds are just nice, and not too consistent that I will wind up counting to their beat. Am I the only one who feels like this?
- A running dishwasher. It’s a very homey noise. I think this originates from evenings of board games at my grandparents, and the nice quiet ambiance of the running dishwasher.
- A train in the distance. All aboard the dreamland express! Trains sound mysterious, and I think that’s a great vibe to fall asleep too. Then again, this is probably because a train runs behind my house (far enough away that the sound can only be heard if it’s quiet, not loud enough to freak you out) and as a kid in bed I really did think there was such a train as the dreamland express. (Then I saw Inception and there was a train in their dreamland, which validated this early childhood belief.)
- Dorm hallway sounds. This is nice, consistent background noise, but better than white noise because it isn’t unnatural and it makes you feel like you aren’t alone. The quiet chattering of neighbors, occasional bathroom door slam, and community tv murmur are very nice.
- A clock. Because if you’re going to count something, the tick of a clock is consistent and won’t leave you wondering when the next one will occur so you can count it, like if you were listening to the ocean. Again, am I the only one here?
Am I crazy? Which sound machine would you use? What would be on yours?